In case you can’t make it out I am saying that I’m wearing the christmas gift I got for chris which he returned to me (not unlike the lakers shirt I got for Andrew which I don’t have anymore) ..we made it to youtube.. Videos starring Ashlee-Heather coming soon…
One time a kid in my English class in high school brought handcuffs to class for some unknown reason. Half way through the class he handcuffed himself to the desk..The teacher looked at him with a seriously confused face and the kid said “reading is fundamental.”.. Amen. Stay in school.
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Ashlee-Heather and I have been sick for a couple days. I got sick after a meeting thursday night. I think Ashlee-Heather is sick from exhaustion. She’s worked pretty hard with over-night shifts this week. I was sick from food poison. I think. Not sick enough to miss 20th row at the Raptors on Friday. I made the big screen too, throwin my hands up in the air. That marks the second time this year that I’ve been able to sit in the lower section at the Raptors games. I never made it down there in three years at Tyndale. Happy Birthday goes out to the Andrew and Kelly’s cats. Uncle Chris will have to give ‘em a hug for me.
It’s very cold outside tonight. About 45 minutes ago I was bundling up to make the walk, over to the church. I said, “I’m not going to be cold tonight wooooo.” Now, my policy states that the only time you walk in the cold is when there is no car in the driveway. Since Ashlee-Heather had to work tonight I was walking. So, I finished budling up and started out on my journey. First, I had to hop over the fence. When I was on the top of the fence I said to myelf (out loud) “it looks like it might be slippery down there.” I started to second guess the jump. Since I had just watched PTI and Wilbon told Kornheiser to “Be a man,” I said to myself “Be a man. Suck it up and go.” And off I went. I found out the hard way that it actually was, in fact, slippery down there. I landed pretty hard on my hiny, as some call it. I didn’t have time to think about whether or not it hurt. I had to spring to my feet because once I crossed the fence I was in a public walking area. I didn’t want to scare anyone and I didn’t want our landlord to look out the window and see me lying on the ground, so I had to move fast.. As I sprung to my feet I found out once again that it was still slippery and landed on my hiny, as some call it, once again and then I just gave up and slid down the hill to the walkway. Good thing I was bundled up. I had warm socks on too. I finished the walk and realized that it actually isn’t that cold out afterall. I might have made the jump if I wasn’t wearing so many layers. I’ll leave you with a poem that I believe one of my brothers shared with me when I was younger, I don’t know which one…
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Tommorrow your butt’s
gonna be black and blue.
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A response to some comments:
Ian, I don’t know how I found Elgin’s blog. I like to jump around from blog to blog and see who I can find. I’m pretty sure it was a my space thing. I found a camp sebago group and he was in it. I just used his nice night for an evening line to a lady here at the church.
Hi LAURen…Cool fact about the beer and baptisms. I’ll tell the pastors at the next meeting. I havn’t met anyone famous lately.
Ashlee-Heather..You didn’t leave a comment but this is in response to your comment at the house..Yes, I will soak the plate that I ate spaghetti off of. Hope you had/have a good night.
Dad and Mom, have fun at officers councils. And I believe the guys name was Randy who peed in the cofee pot. Mom should remember because she beat him up. Hope that doesn’t happen this summer.
Until Next Time… Oh wait I have a speaking engagement on Saturday morning. Tickets are free but you have to be an elder at Bramalea Baptist Church.
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Has anyone seen Mom or Dad?
On another note I was just surfing the blog world and found the blog of the one and only Elgin Traylor. His blog reports that his income is above the $250,000 range. Oh word? yeah 250G’s. That’s my co-counselor. And Andrew’s CIT.
This weekend Ashlee-heather and I watched three movies. A movie marathon, if you will. Here is the list followed by a quote from each.
Grid Iron Gang; “The Rock is a bad actor but the movie was good.”-Ashlee-Heather
Employee of the Month; “You think Jessica Simpson is better than the Rock?…It doesn’t matter.. if you smellellelll what the Rock isss cookin.” -Me just now. And,
Snakes on a Plane; “I’ve had it with these snakes on the plane.”-Samuel L. Jackson with a few choice explatives thrown in.
These were pretty good movies. I must say Snakes on a plane beat my expectations until they got to the part where Keenan, from the old show Keenan and Kal on Nickalodean, took over and landed the plane from his video gaming experience. Or the part where Samuel L. says his famous line and then blows a hole into the plane and Keenan still manages to land it safely.
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Yesterday at church I was telling the story of Job. I started by saying “I’m going to tell you a story of a man who lived a long long long time ago.”
A young chap named Silas, who always gives me a pound [by pound I mean what mom referred to as knockers during a card game asking Andrew to give her some knockers] when he sees me, raised his hand and said “Who is it Martin Luther King Jr?”
And when I asked the kids if anyone has ever had an argument with a friend of family member, a girl said “yeah, one time me and my cousin were building a snowman and he wrecked it and started throwing the snow at me.”
So I said, “So what happened after that? how did you solve it?”
“We started yelling at each other and then decided to build the snowman together.”
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Last night there was a hip-hop seminar at the church with some local artists giving their take on the hip-hop culture and the youth. Actually, one of the panelists is on a break-dancing team that performs at a lot of the Raptor’s games. Anyway, it was pretty insightful. They were saying how a lot of the youth that are in the gang life and stuff like that are in it because they never had a father figure and the gang members have become like their father. They were saying the best way to change that is to develope relationships with them and show them that a better life is possible.
Throughout the whole seminar a certain rapper’s name was mentioned many a time. I really wanted to stand up and announce that I used to lift weights in the same gym as him, before he became famous, but I thought it wasn’t the right time. Anyway, the seminar brought me back to the days when Gator and Chris used to hold free-style battles against each other. One time Chris brought a free-style that left big Walt with no other choice but to sit down.
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And today, if you’re still with me, was my day off. It seems like the day went fast. Probably because I didn’t wake up untill noon. Our bedroom has no windows so it is dark in there at all times unless the lights are on but we sleep with the lights off. I had breakfast at 12:15 and lunch at 1. Then I brought the garbage cans in. Last night was garbage night. The End.
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Daddy Mack recently commented that he was reminded “of when King David ate of the Showbread from the Holy of Holies in I Samuel 21.” That reminded me,for those interested, I will be speaking on this topic on February 11th at 9 and 11A.M in the program that we call Life Zone. The current teaching series at the church is 1 Corinthians and by February 11th we will be talking about Christian Freedom and the Corinthian Church. Since kids like stories I’m bringing them the story of David in 1 Samuel 21. I told Ashlee-heather that 1 and 2 Samuel are my favorite books in the OT and she said that it was only because that’s my middle name. I think she’s on to something. Anyway, everyone should check out Ian’s blog because he has just posted about the return of “Buckets.” I think Andrew and Chris know who Buckets is. I recall a story about Buckets takin it to Andrew and Chris in a game of 21 back in the day. Well, Buckets is back. Nuff said.
I read today that Kwame Brown, former number one draft pick, was walking down the street and stole a man’s birthday cake. I really think that this would be a far better article if the headline was “Ron Ron takes a cake.” Seriously, it’s time for Ron Ron to do something crazy like steal a birthday cake or take on some fans in a no holds barred match. I guess I would settle for reading an article about something Mike Tyson did. They both have been relatively quiet lately so it’s time for one of them to snap. In my mind, there are three athletes that are on the same level of crazy: Tyson, Ron Ron, and T.O. I guess you can also throw Rasheed into the mix. And to make a complete starting five of madness I’ll go way back and throw in the worm Dennis Rodman. In other news, Ashlee-Heather and I watched the American Idol auditions again last night. I never realized how hilarious that show is in the begining. In one of the auditions a little dude with big eyes came in and they asked him something like,”so who do you sing like?” The dude says “I’ve been compared to Justin Timberlake and Lance…uh…Lance…” and Simon says “Armstrong?” You had to be listening closely for that one. I was for some reason. I gotta go..We’re having lasagna for dinner..See ya soon. I’ll leave you with the words of Dr. Phil Sleeper, who I meant to quote in a previous post;
“Just knock on the door and say Courtesy flush in there please…Thank YOu!”….Until next time.
This is my philosophy. I say it almost everynight to Ashlee-heather. “I’m gonna get up early tommorrow so that I can actually sit and eat breakfast.” Actually, the saying goes back to my days with my last roomate[previously referred to as Ricky and not Eric's friend in Scotia]. I would say “early to bed, early to rise that’s my motto.” And then my roomate would politely respond; “why do you even set your alarm you know you’re going to sleep right through it.” The fact is that I struggle with the wake up part of sleeping. Someone once said the early bird gets the worm. I say, let the worms live unless your’e going to use them for fishing. Until next time America..
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Ashlee-heather got called into work today and I forgot to grab a house key before I came to the church. So, now I’ll be at the church for a little too long. Oh, and we have reason to celebrate. We have officially paid off my credit card. Now we just have about 125,000 dollars of loans. Well not quite that much.
Today I recieved an email from my eldest brothren requesting that I continue the blog. I figured that I’d listen to his counsel. He also sent me a link to a very interesting article. It can be found at http://www.iq-home.com/Plumbing/Toilets.htm. It is a well written piece that deserves some attention. I particularly like the model that has two different types of flushing depending on the size of the load. He told me also that this particular company is looking for cloggue tester’s. I’m not sure of the spelling there. You get this job and you go to work take a dump and see if it clogs up the toilet. I guess I kind of already do that if you know what I mean? As I looked over the article I couldn’t help but think to myself, “how could life have been different if these toilets were around, let’s say, early 90’s in Nashville Tennessee. ” The article sets me up perfectly for the following story.
*The following is a true story. Some of the names have been changed for the identity of those involved. The story is, to this day, unsolved.
One day a family decided to take a trip to Nashville, Tennessee. Those present were Mom, Dad, Pappy, Gramma, Andrew, Ricky, and Mike. The Dad had a friend who’s sister had a house down in Tennessee. The house was pretty big, complete with a secret bathroom in the attic. One evening the young Ricky was not feeling well and went missing. Youngest brother Mike decided that he would look all around the house for Rick. After looking high and low, Mike went up the attic stairs to discover the secret bathroom with Ricky trembling because he could not flush the toilet. Ricky looks at Mike and says “Help.” And young Mike, happy to have found his brother, responded by saying “good luck with that,” and rejoined the family. The following morning the family was getting ready to leave Nashville. The Dad and the Mom were getting ready in the secret bathroom when they noticed a toilet with a hefty load in it. The Dad called Andrew, Ricky, and Mike and asked who had done it.
Andrew said “Not me.”
Ricky said “Not me.”
And Mike said “I saw Ricky up there yesterday saying he couldn’t flush it.”
Eventually Ricky said he’d go up and fix it. He does. The family leaves Nashville and to this day no one knows who clogged the toilet. On a side note, at the time of the incident the Dad and Andrew were the only two grown up enough to clog a toilet in that manner but Rick was caught red handed and did volunteer to fix it the next day. But if these powerful toilets existed Ricky would have gotten the load down on the first flush.
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Tonight Ashlee-heather and I watched American Idol and then I did an audition for Ashlee-heather. She was the judge and said “Mike, you’re my husband, I love you but you’re tone deaf!” It must have been the song I picked. Until next time America.
